As many of you will remember, when the newly rebuilt site, launched in October, it was a little early, due to legal and logistical issues beyond our control. One of the aspects of the new site that was not quite ready was the limits to messages for free members. Until a few days ago, free members were getting the unlimited conversations that supporters get. We have now re-introduced the allowances. They are more generous than they were on DN1. Messaging is still free, but not completely unlimited. You can still have unlimited messages, but if you have conversations with more than 25 people, you will need to delete some of the older conversations. Supporters get UNLIMITED conversations! and can still message a free member who have used up their allowance.
Messages imported from the old site are 'free'. They do not cont toward your conversation allowance (unless you sent or received additional messages after 1st October 2025) and deleting them does not make space for more).
Messages are now arranged as conversations, just like WhatsApp, Signal, just about anywhere you might send someone a message. There is a sort and filter pull down menu to help you find a conversation, though the easiest way is just to go to his profile.
To send someone a message (or just find a conversation)
Open his profile, and click the message link at the top of the page
This will open the conversation with that person (if it's a new conversation, the page will be empty)
Sent messages are on the right, with a dark background, received messages are on the left.
- Write the message in the section at the bottom, and press return (recommended) or click the paper aeroplane arrow (we know we need to move that help button, AND make this space expandable!)
- You can lock and unlock your private content by clicking the padlock icon, bottom left.
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You can attach pics or videos individually, with the links at the bottom of the page. Click the link and you will see a pop up. Click the box below one or more pics and click 'attach selected photos' (video works in exactly the same way)
The selected pics will then appear below the text box (these are test pics, no solo pets or scenery allowed 😉)
If you change your mind (before sending), click the 'attach...' link again and reselect.
Supporters can unsend a message, either before or after the recipient has seen it. If it's unseen, the waiting message notification (see below) will disappear.
You can send someone a map with your current location by clicking the 'share location' link, bottom right in an open conversation. Great for hookups! If you don't have your location set correctly, this wonk work, check out this help page.
Incoming?
If you have any waiting messages, you will see the main pic of the sender here, to the left of the main menu (we are working on better notifications for mobile users). Click the pic.
You can also open any conversation form the messages page (click the link in the main menu).
This is the messages page of my test profile (there would usually be many more conversations listed, but my main profile has the names and pics of members, so I've used this to maintain privacy). The open conversation is the one that does NOT have the grey background. (the dark grey is a waiting message, not currently open).
Clicking the right pointing arrow for each participant in the list on the left, will switch to that conversation.
Reached your limit?
You can see how many of your conversations you are using here, top right
If you have 25 out of 25, you need to delete some (sent after September 2025). Clicking the main pic/avatar of a participant will open the delete button
Click it to delete the conversation. THIS CANNOT BE UNDONE! Just like most messaging apps, so please be careful!
The 'save' options are for future use and can be ignored or now (nothing auto expires, so nothing needs to be saved), though please be aware, if you delete a conversation, the saved message goes too!
You can send someone a map with your current location EXPAND THIS WITH an explanation, link to the location page etc.
Problems?
Can't message?
If you don't see the option for messages in the main menu, you only have partial access. Your profile isn't approved yet. This rarely takes more than 24 hour.
Missing old site messages?
Almost all old messages were imported from the old site. The easiest way to find a specific message is to go to the profile of that member (click search in the main menu and name search is the first option) open his profile and click the message.